#1 - I let the hair go. I get tired of my blonde hair and decide I'm going to go natural. Somewhere around week 6 (when roots aren't disgusting yet), I start getting really crazy and decide to stop getting it cut too. I picture Jennifer Aniston with her long, natural looking honey blonde hair.
By week 8, I'm wearing my hair in a pony tail every day and I'm so grossed out by the roots that I decide it's just plain not worth it taking care of myself at all.
So I don't.
#2 - I start eating a little more poorly.
#3 - I ease up on the exercise. Okay I darn near stopped it. Do
#4 - The house gets a little messy. Well, what do you expect? I can't think straight anymore because there are no endorphins to keep me alert, and I am starting to really feel like Roseanne Barr.
#5 - Muffin top appears and I start to avoid getting my picture taken.
#6 - Start thinking about cutting my own hair or, hell, shave it off cuz it couldn't look worse.
#7 - Then there is an awakening. Like, I see a photo my husband took of me walking at the zoo. Oh, holy Jesus. Is that me?
#8 - It gets worse. I decide to take a photo with my girlfriends (same zoo trip). Husband suggests that I take my vest off for the photo. I tell him no, it's covering my muffin top, to which he responds, "trust me, you will look better with a muffin top - the vest makes you look like a boy (OH MY GOD).
Then I see the photo later and gasp. What THE What?!!!
My hair does NOT look like Jennifer Aniston.
My "muffin top" is not a muffin top at all. It's a super sized full muffin that is bigger than my boobs (which are not small!)
My arms are lacking any definition at all. You'd never know that just a few short months ago I was a fitness instructor. Don't spit your coffee out. It's true!
But this didn't happen overnight. It was slowly, one missed workout at a time. One missed hair appointment at a time. One cookie at a time.
Enough is enough
Lazy phase over. I went running Saturday and again this morning.
I'm meeting a girlfriend at the gym tonight to start toning.
I signed up for the mud run and I am running the LH half marathon again in May.
And praise the Lord, I have a hair appointment tomorrow!!!
On the BRIGHT SIDE, no one said I smelled like the animals. Isn't this a cute photo of my daughter looking at a goat?